I had to help one of my best friends pass over this season. He death was imminent but I was late to see it. No, that is not right. I saw it but had only ever seen him for our 15 years together as a spunky warrior-spirited creature with a tenacious will to live on his own terms and determined to use up all of his 9 lives. Which he did. So I was in classic denial.
He did in fact use up almost all 9 of his lives. He was patched up by the vet at great expense to us many times because he always fought bigger cats and took a beating. He wandered relentlessly in his younger years and even survived getting himself locked in a garage. We thought he was dead, but after being close to death by starvation for 10 days he made his way back, skinny as a super model barely able to meow.
Julius had as many names as he had lives. Memorable among others was Axel, because he squatted under cars and Dusty Baker because he rolled in dirt. But the one that stuck at the end of his life was Little Fucker. He was uppity but sweet, full of himself but loved affection. Plus, he just never gave up and was part of our family as we moved through some traumatic times.
We were very close. The first day we brought him and his sister home from the kill shelter he looked up at me, squeezed his cat eyes like they do and emanated love. I knew he said you are mine and that is exactly how it came to be. When it came time for his passing, I was the last in our family to admit he needed help and wasn’t just pushing through to resurrect into another phase in his 15 year strappy cat life. I finally had to accept it.
I made the call and found an angel who came to my home to pass him. She was compassionate and had the best drugs. She said we should all go this way. We gave him the first sedative, then she gave him the one that put him into a bliss state. After he was in a dreamstate she put him on my lap and administered the IV. He was gone immediately, out of pain that I didn’t know about. After he passed she kindly observed that he was ready to go – and that I had done the right thing – by his smiley face. This picture is not of that but of how smiley smug he was with his own life. This is what I will remember.
Namaste all sentient beings.